Thursday, April 24, 2008

She wiped His feet with her hair....


1. Awesome Sunset 2. Me and Andy 3. Drumming...:)




4. The gang 5. STAR WARS TEAM!!! 6. Roommate Bec and Me
For those of you that arnt farmilar with the Bible, there is a story about a woman named Mary. Mary loved Jesus. One day while Jesus was teaching to a crowd, Mary came with a perfume jar that was worth a years wages. She knelt at Jesus' feet, broke the jar over him and wiped his feet with her hair- John 12:1-9
I was reminded of this passage two weeks ago while in a worship session. It has continiously been brought up in my mind and my prayer has been to have such deep devotion and intensity in following Christ, just as Mary did.
Today was my day.
I had planned to fast today but little did I know that God would ask for more than one days worth of food... Today in session we were listening to this heart throbbing story about the prositution in the Red Light District in Amsterdam when the words "your hair" popped into my mind. Weird, I know...even curious. The session was great and passion filled. It was talking about how my generation is great yet our tragedy is passivity. We get lost in video games and false realities...which i completely agree with. And the challenge was to not merely "think" about action but actually take action. My heart throbbed with the desire yet my fear of action and responsibility overwhelmed me just the same....
HERES THE KICKER... to end, the preacher asked us to go back to our rooms grab something of value that is important to us and give it up to Jesus. So there I go daddiling back to my room trying to think of something I can give up whether material or emotional, whatever...than... it hits me- hard and fast...before I knew what I had to do and before I had time to think...I ran to my room...made a direct beeline for my knife and headed back to the gym. I started weeping as my fingers gripped the knife. I stood infront of the cross, behind everyone else with puddles forming under my feet. I prayed for help. A girl came over that I had only met once. I handed her the knife. I told her to cut my hair. With tear filled eyes and a shaky hands...she started cutting. With every cut, a tear. With every tear, a smile. I knew at that moment what Mary must have felt when she wiped Jesus' feet with her hair. I knew what it meant to worship Jesus...

So now, My hair is short, about chin length and still really choppy and uneven. But I love it. After having the day to process what went on this morning there are a few remaining things I want to say. - I do not at all regret what I did. This truely was the highest and most perfect sacrifice I could have known. It is difficult to explain but I will try. See, I have been known as the tall, beautiful long-blonde girl. I have taken so much pride in that fact. I have always been able to use my beauty to be seen or stand out. Beauty has always been a security for me because if I don't feel comfortable I could always hide behind a pretty face and long flowing locks...:) I do not want to hide anymore. I do not want to use the beauty God has given me to glorify my own looks anymore. I want people to see Christs beauty in me now. I want my eyes, my smile, my laugh, but most of all my actions to show Christs love and bring people in. Amen! I want to be the woman that is willing to give up everything for the sake of knowing Christ and it has to begin with herself. I was broken before Jesus' today, BUT, as I stood there weeping...all I heard was..."you are worth more than your hair. You are BEAUTIFUL despite how long or short your hair is. I can USE you now...!!!" -.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-. Can anyone say AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Today has been an emotional day and there were times when I said- "your crazy!" But at those moments of discouragement, one or two people would walk by and tell me what an encouragment that act was today. Ironically enough, I felt uncomfortable anyone saying that because I cut my hair to try and rid the attention factor but I guess God had other plans.
I was able to share this infront of the whole DTS tonight in one of our meetings and it was incredible. The story, however, doesnt end there...when I got up in front of that crowd, in front of that pulpit with a microphone...I knew my calling was just beginning...:)
THE NEW DUE...

video

One of the most amazing nights of worship I've ever seen... sorry its sideways...